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November 5, 2007
Alright I give in, I am going straight to the drugstore and buying every =
variety of vitamin B, C , D and Iron I see. Yesterday we lost an hour to =
daylight savings time and all that means is there's one hour less to =
snatch=20
all those nutrients from the sun which incidentally is also killing us. =
It's
so confusing this whole business of what to eat, what to drink and =
whether=20
to slather 30 or 40 SPF sunscreen over every inch of your body. Eat fish =
they say , not red meat and definitely not chicken ( especially the ones =
with three heads). But heaven forbid it's tuna or salmon, they've got =
enough
mercury to make you a walking thermostat. Drink wine, red not white and =
no=20
more then two glasses a day. If you have a sip more, then the valves en=20
route to your heart will go from being joyfully roomy and sturdy to=20
resembling the sides of a blow up kids pool after it's been poked apart =
by=20
birds and is slowly deflating. They tell you to eat dark chocolate and =
all=20
of a sudden it's a diet craze, with people packing on the pounds, "oh" =
they=20
say "we forgot to say only eat 1.6 ounces a day- sorry about that". =
Sorry is
all they can say to the people who after quitting smoking not only have =
to=20
deal with the pangs of nicotine withdrawal but cocoa from the chocolate =
as=20
well. I guess the additional chocolate addiction is better then some of =
the=20
other stop smoking aids. I know a woman who has been chewing Nicorette =
gum=20
for twenty years- longer than she ever smoked and she chews a pack a =
day.=20
Yes that's right, a pack a day for twenty years, you could build a =
school in
Africa for that amount of money. So you think you are on the straight =
and=20
narrow, eating well, getting enough fibre, drinking enough water, =
getting=20
enough sleep (but not too much, that's even worse), but still the =
thought of
going to the gym makes your head spin like the chick in the Poltergeist=20
movie. Then you turn on the news and there are pictures of Katie Holmes =
( a=20
mother of a toddler) standing at the finish line of the New York City=20
Marathon and then two hours later not only standing but smiling at her=20
husband's movie premiere and it hits you, forget the drugstore- you're =
going
straight to the Scientology center and signing up! The long term health=20
effects of religious cults haven't yet been pinpointed , but hey it =
can't be
worse then trans fats.
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